A lot of people seem to be saying... I am so sorry for what you are going through... I am so sorry for this, so sorry for that. At first I feel good listening to it but now... I don't anymore. DON"T tell me you are sorry, the reason is because some of them are just saying it and not from the bottom of the heart, the other reason is because I am feeling so lucky. Instead... be happy for me for having such a beautiful sweet baby boy.
After talking to Brandy and reading her story about her 2 kids, why do people even feel sorry for me? The only major issue my son has is his breathing and it's not the end of the world... we have technology now, we have ventilators, pacers.... it's not like he there is nothing in the world to help him and he will die soon. Even though I don't know what lies ahead.... it doesn't matter, we are cherishing each day at a time.
I am glad that my friend came to visit me yesterday, she's going through what I went through when I found out that I was pregnant with you. Yes... I am not proud of it but I have to admit that I had a thought of letting you go but... when I laid my eyes on you, even though you have CCHS, I DO NOT have that thoughts anymore and I was telling your Dada that if I were to be given another chance, knowing that you have CCHS when I first conceive, I will still want to have you, it will just give me more chance to prepare and know what to do right at the beginning instead of making you suffer for weeks.
Anyway, I received an email from her today, telling me that after seeing us, it changed what she thinks and was feeling since she is also pregnant with #3 and she just had #2 a year ago. I am glad that you are such an inspiration to others.... SO.... people, don't tell me that you are sorry for me... because I am not sorry for myself. Like one of the CCHS mom said... guess what, we really got the Jackpot of the disabilities. After all, our kids can grow up near normal life, just that they need a little help breathing when they sleep.
I have you... I have my baby, you are still here and we will live a very fulfilling life... I love you SWEET BABY BOY!
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