Constantly being told that you SUCK!!!!

Yes, this is how I feel... I feel that constantly, customers tell me that I SUCK!!! Yes, I suck.  I cannot answer your email within 2 days, I cannot ship your important diapers withn 3 days.  I cannot do a lot of things.  WHY??? 

I told a customer today that if my life were to be PERFECT now, I wouldn't have to wait for 2 days to answer your email, I would answer your emails within 2 hours.... I would ship the item as soon as you hit purchase and pay.  I would be able to work on my day job stuff and get back to everyone within a few hours... my life now is FAR from normal, do not even mention about perfect.  It will never be normal again. 

Sometimes, I feel that I am badly beaten up.  People constantly make me feel that I am not good.  Even my own dad, I have no clue why is always upset and showing black faces at home daily.  I am very tired...

I don't need people to pity me, I don't need people to feel sorry for me... just give others a chance.  I once told a customer, you get upset and mad over an incorrect diaper color that was sent to me.  I apologized and resent the correct color and she got to keep the incorrect one.  I wish that is my "PROBLEM" and i wish that's the only thing that is making me "jump" but NOooooooooo..... that's not it.

Besides breathing problem, he has belly issues.... he already went for a surgery exactly when he turned a month old but still having issues.  You guys are lucky, you have a normal and healthy baby... you get frustrated when your baby cries, I am overjoyed to hear some sound coming out of my baby because he has a trach and I CANNOT HEAR HIM CRY!!!! 

I think I need to be back on my pills again, it looks like I am going down south these few days, of course not having enough sleep is a big factor.

I just wish that I do not exist in this world, that way, people will not need to get upset with me for not shipping fast enough, people will not be mad and upset with me for not answering them fast enough.  That way, their life will be perfect because there isn't JUNKS like me in their world!